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Don’t be tempted to defend yourself when asking for a divorce

You've mulled over this decision for the last five years, and you've finally come to the choice. You're going to get a divorce, whether your spouse likes it or not. In fact, at this point, it really wasn't a choice but a need. You can't live in this relationship anymore – and now you have to leave it.

The thing is, you haven't broken the news to your spouse yet, and you need a little bit of advice. Perhaps one of the most important ideas you should hold firmly in your mind during this conversation is this: Don't try to defend yourself.

If you're the only one who wants to end the marriage, your spouse could react with sadness, anger or arguing. You have to remember that, for you, this is not a topic for debate. You will stand firm in your decision, and you don't have to defend yourself. Simply wanting this, or simply needing this, is enough. In fact, the simple fact that you have made the decision has to be enough.

Engaging in useless arguments that will never be resolved is only going to make matters worse. Be polite, be patient, be diplomatic and be kind, but don't allow your soon-to-be ex to goad you into an argument.

Divorcing peacefully and respectfully will save you time, money and heartache -- and it will be especially helpful in a high-asset divorce process. Learn how you and your spouse can divorce in the kindest way possible by getting in touch with our law firm at your earliest convenience. We believe in peaceful divorces whenever possible; nevertheless, if required, we will protect your legal rights all the way to trial.

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