When parents divorce or separate, they have more issues to address than spouses who do not share children. Parents have to negotiate arrangements for dividing time with their children and responsibility for them. If they cannot agree on terms between themselves, then they may need to take the matter to family court.
A judge can learn about family circumstances and then make a determination about how to divide parental rights and responsibilities. In litigated cases, judges typically focus their efforts on upholding the best interests of the children involved. Sometimes, that may require a review of the child’s preferences and their opinion about their relationships with their parents.
Can children who may soon be subject to custody orders choose on their own behalf where they live when their parents divorce?
Children do not control custody matters
Children are subject to the control and oversight of parents under the law in part because they lack the facilities to effectively manage their lives on their own. Their brains are still growing and maturing. They may struggle to understand the long-term implications of the choices they make.
While judges do care about a child’s opinion and wishes when making custody determinations, they consider many other factors as well. Once a child turns 12 or 13, a judge may want to hear about their preferences as they decide how to allocate parental rights and responsibilities.
However, a judge does not take instructions from the child. Instead, the child’s preferences are one of several important considerations that influence their final decision about custody matters. A judge wants what is best for the child, which is usually a strong bond with both parents.
Once there is a custody order in place, the child generally has to abide by the terms set by the judge. Spending time with one of their parents. The other parent could face consequences if they do not convince the children to uphold the custody arrangements. Even parents who currently have a difficult relationship with their children can potentially obtain shared custody by taking their issues to family court.
Learning more about the rules that govern child custody matters can help parents assert themselves. A child’s wishes can change over time and are unlikely to be the main consideration when a judge divides parental rights and responsibilities when their parents divorce.
