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How to engage with your kids when you have custody

After your divorce, you and your ex plan to share custody of the children. You are well aware that means you will not see them as often as you used to. They may spend every other week with your ex. You may see them just over the weekends. It depends on the specifics of your schedule, but the fact of the matter is that you have less time together.

As such, you really want to engage with them when they're with you. You want to make every day and every moment count. How can you do it?

First off, make sure that you leave work at work. When you get home, it's just time for them. You don't want them to be watching a movie in one room while you stay up late working on a project in your office. Kids really understand how much you value them by how much time you give them.

Next, make a set list of goals. Do you want time to talk? Do you want to have adventures together? Do you want to teach them specific skills? When you know what your goals are, it's easier to work toward them.

Finally, set aside time for them to choose the activities. They may go along with what you want to do, but they know that you're picking it. It's important to let them choose and to show them that you enjoy it, too. They really connect with you more if they're also excited about what you're doing together.

As you move forward, make sure you are also well aware of the legal rights you have to stay involved in their lives.

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