The only person who has a relationship with your child that comes anywhere near your own may be your child's teacher. They spend all day together, five days a week, and the power and authority dynamics can be similar.
If you get divorced, it is often wise to let the teacher know what is happening. It can impact your child's behavior and some very practical aspects of their life, like who picks them up when the school day ends. It's important to keep teachers in the loop.
With that in mind, here are a few things that teachers said they wanted to tell divorced parents:
- Teachers do not want to hear the negative aspects of your personal relationship. Even if the teacher knows you and your ex, don't complain to them.
- Teachers are glad to work with parents and tell them how the kids are doing. They have insights into the child's life, how they're coping with the divorce and how it is impacting their behavior. They want to work with parents to share this information.
- Teachers will be open and honest with both parents. This means you should never ask the teacher to keep something from your ex.
- Parenting should never become a competition between you and your ex. Don't try to one-up each other with school involvement.
- You and your ex need to work together to raise the child. That means both coming to parent-teacher conferences, for instance. Teachers do not want to have all of the same conversations multiple times.
As you move forward with your life, make sure you know what custody rights you have and how you and your ex can work together to put your child first.